Two Sweethearts, One Table

I know, I know - I'm not clever. At least I try right!? ;) Today, we're talking sweetheart tables. Before I talk about the table, though, let me talk more about the decision making process.

Like many bees before me, when I started thinking about all the things you must know before you get married, I thought it would be beneficial for us to read Gary Chapman's The 5 Love Languages. I know how I give love to others, but when it came down to my preference in receiving love, I wasn't exactly sure how my results would come out. After reading the book and taking the assessment, both Mr. O and I scored the highest in quality time. Given how we enjoy spending our time, the results did make sense... which leads me to table talk.

Given that our preference is spending quality time together, we wanted to ensure that we had moments of our day built in that would give us that quality time - special moments for just the two of us to enjoy without any pressure. Since we're having a fairly small wedding, we plan to skip the receiving line and visit with our guests after we finish eating. We also considered that if we had a more traditional head table, we would be talking to some of our favorite people, but not necessarily each other.

So - a sweetheart table it will be! Not to mention... I love the look of a sweetheart table in photos!

Image via Style Me Pretty / Photography by Allie Lindsey Photography

This is my standout favorite, I've even started looking around for similar letters!

Image via Every Last Detail / Photography by K and K Photography

Another beautiful option, especially if we can't find any letters we love!

For practical reasons, we're going to have a four person round rather than a two. This will allow us room to display my boutique, have our Mr & Mrs letters, and ensure that I have plenty of room to not spill on my dress. ;) 

What do you think? For married bees that did a sweetheart table, did it work out well for you?

Reintroducing our venue

Do you guys remember when I shared that we had finally found our dream venue? Well, since my photos weren't of top notch quality (since iPhone plus rain does not equal pretty pictures), I decided that before I can move forward with more of our planning details, I had to share photos that would do our venue some justice.

Photography by our venue coordinator, Megan \ Used with permission from the Mustard Seed Gardens Facebook page This is the ceremony space, and depending upon the number of guests we have, we may choose to use a similar seating arrangement! It may be a tad difficult considering the way the gazebo is set up, however I'm confident that we'll figure out something great. :) 

Photography by our venue coordinator, Megan \ Used with permission from the Mustard Seed Gardens Facebook page

Photo via the Mustard Seed Gardens Facebook page / Photography by Stuart Meyer Photography

The barn is where we'll be holding the reception (and possibly the ceremony, depending on the weather), so I'm thrilled that these lights and paper lanterns are now included in our wedding package! The way the photo below is set up is very close to how we'll set up the venue for the big day. The only difference is that instead of a head table, we're going to have a sweetheart table (more about that coming up soon!). 

Photo via the Mustard Seed Gardens Facebook page / Photography by Stuart Meyer Photography

So now, with the much better quality photos - what do you think!? Can you see how we're planning to use minimal decor to pull off the rustic, romantic vibe we're going for?

I'm a flower child at heart

A while back, my FMIL and I got to go and meet with Stacy and Melissa of Design Group to get a quote for our FLOWERS! I've said over and over again that I want something simple and I stand by that - the flowers will be simple, but gorgeous! 

What some of you may not know about me is that I'm very much a flower child. I maintain that though I love all things tech and social media, the essence of my soul was meant to be living during the 60's - enjoying The Beatles live, attending Woodstock, not showering (and that being completely acceptable, haha) and wearing flowers in my hair every day. Since that isn't the case, I've taken the flower child in myself and tried to throw that essence into the actual flowers for the big day.

Now, for those shaking their heads at me for not doing it myself: there isn't a lot that I plan to DIY for the wedding, simply because I think some things are best left to professionals, and the florals are definitely one of them. I tried my hand at helping with florals a couple times during my internship at a wedding venue and let's just say: they weren't pretty. Someone else often had to fix my attempts at floral art so there's NO WAY I'm taking on that responsibility for my own wedding day.

I jokingly warned Mr. Otter and my FMIL that Stacy and Melissa were going to LOOOOVE me because I had a Keynote presentation all prepared with my inspiration photos as well as VERY detailed instructions (down to how many corsages, bouquets, what color I wanted them wrapped in, and etc.). I meant it sarcastically but guess what? Those photos and counts made our meeting go by super quickly and it was painless. I knew exactly what I wanted and instead of having to poke and prod me for answers, I laid it all out and they double checked my counts and details. We were told to expect a quote in about a week, but because of how much I had already prepared for them, they were able to get me a quote the very next day!

Now, on to the inspiration photos!

Image via WeddingChicks.com / Photo by Emily Steffen Photography / Flowers by The Bride and MOH (Impressive!)

The bouquets will all be as similar to this as possible. Mine will be the largest, then the BMs will get a similar configuration, just smaller. I'm really IN LOVE with the way this looks both in the coloring and variety of flowers, so this was an easy pick for me.

Image via Nicole Hill / Photo by Nicole Hill / Flowers by Mayflowers

And on to the boutonnieres - I love Lamb's Ear, so that was a requirement. When I came across these, I knew they were the perfect compliment to the flowers the girls and I will be carrying. Hopefully the men don't mind a little blush in their wardrobe. ;)

Image via Style Me Pretty / Photo by 1313 Photography / Flowers by Ines Naftali Floral & Event Design

And on to the centerpieces. Again, I felt like these colors perfectly complimented the other flowers and I love that the twine adds a little something extra to the mason jars. One of my concerns initially was having two centerpieces, just based on the fact that I really, really don't want a cluttered table. But they assured me that the table won't be too cluttered, and even demonstrated by sitting some jars on the 2 person round we were meeting on and they were right - it definitely won't take up a ton of space on the table, leaving the table open for guests to feel like they won't knock anything over or feel like they can't converse because of our centerpieces.

My only disappointment is that they cautioned me that peonies may not be available. I'm fine with garden roses (especially considering that most can't tell/won't care about the difference) but I still want those peonies. So everyone cross your fingers for me!

Is there a non-negotiable flower in your wedding dreams? Or am I the only neurotic peony stalker here?

The Venue: Part 3

After the post about our venue requirements, then the post about the horrible tour we took, I'm pretty sure that you guys probably thought I was lying about finding the perfect venue... I wasn't! And today, I'm finally sharing.

Our venue is..... Mustard Seed Gardens!

To say Mustard Seed Gardens was our dream venue is an understatement. One of my mom's coworkers suggested it and I am so glad she did!

What put Mustard Seed on our list to tour was the barn, hands down. I really wanted a barn, and the location just can not be beat. Speaking with Megan, the event coordinator, confirmed our thoughts that this was truly the perfect venue. A great price, the ability to bring in our own (affordable!) caterer, and the fact that my emails were answered within the same day? Amazing. Touring the space only further confirmed that we wanted to have our wedding there.

What sold us on the venue?

• The space and venue itself, first and foremost. It is priced very reasonably and they have a discount for rentals that will make those more affordable for us. There is a ton of parking and it's very conveniently located.
• We LOVED that it's a family business. I really felt that both Mark (the owner) and Megan (his daughter/the event coordinator) cared about our event and answering my 5 million questions.
• We love the gazebo, and what really stood out to me was that we could do 360 seating if we wanted to. Even better? We didn't bring that up, Mark did. That assured me that they're on top of the current wedding trends and willing to work with us on whatever we come up with.
• Lastly, the venue was just what we were looking for in that it was simple and rustic. It doesn't need a ton of decor to make it look pretty, because it is gorgeous without any decor! Our vision of decor and flowers really fit right in with the venue.

And now, photos! I took some on our tour, and even though they're a little dreary due to rain, I think it's still a great representation of our venue!

The bridal preparation area - the boys will be outside in a totally different structure prior to the wedding.

Here is where I will process (from the door behind Mr. Otter) through this screened in porch...

...then go through this arch to our ceremony site...

...this gazebo!

This is the reception space: the barn! When I took these photos, they had just started their renovations. 

After all the renovations, the barn won't have a ceiling and will only have a partial second floor.

This photo was taken standing in the barn entry, looking out on the property - including the ceremony area!

When we were finished with our tour, Mark let us sit down and ask him the long list of questions I still had. Most I had answered by Megan via email, but I still had a few to ask during our tour. While we were talking, this kitten and Mr. Otter became fast friends. :)

So, obviously we're in love, but what do you guys think about the gazebo and barn!? 

The Venue: Part 2

In my last post about venues, I described how we narrowed our list down to two venues that we would actually go and tour.

Personal image / The mom's driving us... like going on a date before you can drive... except, you know, to check out wedding venues. :)

So I'm not going to share the name of the venue here that we looked at and didn't love but let me just say, I was disappointed we didn't love it. Looking at photos, it looked like a beautiful space for a wedding but unfortunately, it just wasn't as magical in person.

*Special shout out here goes to my FFIL who totally called that we wouldn't like it. When I sent the two venues to them to check out prior to touring, FFIL said that this venue just really wasn't doing it for them because it just looked like an old building. I saw their point, but definitely thought we would like it more in person... I was wrong. Good call by my FFIL!*

So we went to the first tour (our venue! Eek!) and loved it. As soon as we got in the car, we all agreed that we loved the first venue. It was beautiful, exactly what I was looking for in both price range and style, and we were absolutely thrilled with the person who gave us our tour. The majority of the lunch break we took before tours was about how we would set up the day at that venue, where we would take photos, all of that. But regardless of our love for them, I still wanted to check out the second venue. My thought was basically if we don't tour it, I'm always going to wonder what if...

So off we went to our second tour. Immediately, I had a bad taste in my mouth. We entered the venue, which was pretty, and were taken to an office to talk before the tour. Unfortunately, that talk took a good 20 minutes... way too long, in our opinion. The owner of the building gave us a detailed history of the venue. Now, here's the thing - I'm definitely interested in the history, but we didn't come here to get the history! We came to see the venue. Give us a pamphlet about the history and take us on our tour. Not off to a great start.

As we were touring, I have to admit I did really like bits and pieces of the venue. We especially liked that they had a hair and nail salon in the same building, as well as really wonderful preparation areas for the bride and groom. Seeing the rooms, though, there were a few flaws that we just COULD NOT look past.

• First, in all of the rooms except one (and that one we didn't like at all, it was just a plain, white walled room - more on that in just a second) there were pillars throughout the space. While the spaces were pretty, they screamed "reception" to us and not ceremony. There was literally no way to set up any of the rooms we liked so that everyone would be able to see us during our ceremony.
• The white walled room I just mentioned? That's the "destination room." There, they fill up the room with sand and faux trees, project a picture of the ocean on the wall, and pipe in ocean sounds to give you a destination wedding. *scratches head* I'm sorry... WHAT? This is Indiana. If you want a destination wedding, hop on a plane and go somewhere with a beach! I understand that destination weddings can be expensive, but if you're in Indiana and want the ocean (or something similar), why not go up to Michigan and get married on one of their stunning beaches? Needless to say, the destination room concept didn't sit well with us...
• Which leads me to my next point: we had a very, very different vision of what was "gorgeous" than the venue owner did. He kept talking about how "gorgeous" the destination room was and it made me really question his judgment.

After our tour concluded, we went back to the office where he said he would show us "a few photos." Before I go any further, I have to point out that pretty much as soon as we saw the final room, we were done and ready to go. I knew this wasn't the right space and Mr. Otter agreed, so we were just looking at photos as a courtesy.

At that point, the photos began. And they kept coming... and coming... and coming. I'm not kidding, we probably saw around 10 folders of photos and it took at least another 30 minutes! The photos weren't in a slideshow or anything, so at the conclusion of clicking through each album, he would have to go back and select another album... It was excruciating!

And again, he was sharing with us how "gorgeous" and "stunning" all of these tablescapes were... we just didn't like them. They were pretty much a dead ringer for the photo I showed of what I didn't want; tall centerpieces, busy tables, a linen plus chair covers plus sashes plus colored napkins... Just not our style. At the conclusion of the too long photo montage, he asked us if we would like to see a more complete price sheet, customized to what we were thinking for our day. We politely said no and ran out of there.

Phew! Someone tell me I'm not the only one who had a really, really bad venue tour? 

Up next: I'm sharing THE venue!

The Venue: Part 1

No, not a venue. THE venue. We found the venue!

But what kind of Bee just tells you the good without the bad? Or the story without any background? Or the dessert without the veggies?* So for part one of the venue search, I'm talking about what criteria we used to search for venues that we would physically go and tour.

First and foremost, before we even checked prices, we looked at photos. Here's why: We have a budget, of course. But the thing about the budget is that the wedding is in April - still just over six months away. I'm going to stick as close to my budget as possible (and by as close to, I mean UNDER it if at all possible!) but if we really, really want something - we're going to make it happen. So before we even looked at prices, we looked at some photos from previous events to get a feel for what the venue could do well and what their general aesthetic was.

This photo is a great example of what we didn't want:

Image via AllegroPhotography.com / Photo by Allegro Photography / Event by David Tutera Weddings

If this is your taste, then it's beautiful! Go for it! When I look at this photo though, I thought it was too over the top for the rustic, romantic feel we wanted. I didn't like the lighting, the way the room is set up, or the tall, tall centerpieces. Actually, to be really blunt: I hate the centerpieces. Not because they're ugly (they aren't!) but because I want our guests to be able to talk and get to know each other! 

With that in mind, I started seriously looking at venues and considering prices. A huge factor in prices was the catering. We really don't place a high value on the food. Sure, we want to eat something that tastes good and looks nice but honestly? With our budget (and our personal preferences!) a plated reception was not in the cards. Buffet, it is. 

This point in our criteria led to a lot of places getting marked off our list when I saw their catering minimums. I don't want to spend more than $3,500 on food and drink, so when I saw a venue with a catering minimum of $5,000 or $13,000 (and yes - that $13,000 is a real minimum of an actual venue that we considered) they were crossed off our list.

After that, I started sending out inquiries. Asking questions about when we could come in to set up, what their other vendor policies were, what the deposit would be, what our total price would be for X guests, and etc. The majority of responses I got back required no other action on my part, because they were crossed right off the list. Some charged way, way too much for rentals. A couple had guest minimums that we wouldn't meet. One never responded, so they were off the list anyway because if you can't respond to my inquiry, how can I trust you with our wedding!? (<--- Type A, I know.)

After all of the above, we had three venues on our list. One was my dream venue, a gorgeous barn about three hours North of my hometown. The perfect in between for the majority of our guests - mine coming from central Indiana, and Mr. Otter's coming from Michigan. The catch? They had a minimum for both guest list (200) and catering ($7,000) - neither of which I was willing to meet. I kept them on my list for a while because it was my dream venue... but eventually, I took them off too.

We were down to two...

Coming next: the venue we toured and hated! And please, someone else tell me that I'm not the only one who made a list then crossed people off when I saw their minimums? 

*That is a line from one of our favorite movies... can you guess which one? Mr. Otter and I LOVE to repeat this ridiculous line over and over again.